A Piece of His Peace

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A Piece of His Peace
She woke up early in the morning with a heavy heart. There were so many things that clouded her mind, so many things that ruined her comfort. While she laid still in bed, she exhaled. Told herself that no matter what happened yesterday, she had been given today. She would make the most of it or at least try.
There are things in life that have caused us to feel pain. In some cases, we may even have been the person who inflicted the pain. We try hard to not wear the pain on own shoulders, but every now and then, the pain becomes too much to handle.
We begin to feel empty. We distance ourselves from those who truly care and we tend to overthink and over criticize ourselves. Too often we find ourselves stiff and heavy burdened.
You didn’t get that dream job.
You lost the baby you so desperately wanted.
Your husband wants a divorce.
Your church isn’t as friendly and welcoming as you thought.
You just feel stuck in a rut.
The reality is, those things are apart of our journey. Those things are life experiences that we have (or will) endure. Those levels of pain will always come at the WORST time. You simply can’t prepare yourself for heartache.
I have been the girl who laid stiffly in the bed. Overwhelmed and underappreciated. The girl who questioned her purpose in life.  If I’m honest, I have been the girl who was MAD at God.
 MAD because he promised me that He would never leave me, but yet I felt absolutely alone.
MAD because I had the biggest passion but never the opportunity to bloom.
MAD because I loved to give but didn’t have the means to give when it mattered most.
MAD because I felt the love I had to give wasn’t good enough.
In my “MAD” stage, I grew distant. I became reserved and felt small. I knew deep down inside that God still loved me but I simply didn’t understand why HE (God) was punishing me.
But then he sent a reminder. God has a way of capturing me in the stillest of moments. You know, when it’s 12:30 am and everyone else is asleep.  He whispered to me, Daughter, I know you feel as if I am far away and that the matters of your heart have not been met, but if you would just Trust who I am, you would see that I am for you.  You are not forgotten. Be patient and know that I have your best in mind.
And just in case, I wasn’t sure if I heard correctly, he always sends a peace. It’s as if he reaches down to hug me and remind me how special I am.
If you reading this and you can relate don’t give up. Take some time to just sit in the stillest moment. Whenever I remove the distractions and ask God to send his peace- HE always does.
Galatians 6:9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Photo by Duncan Shaffer on Unsplash

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